prayers

my heart is aching today. such deep pain. sadness i have not felt in such a long time.

i am so disgusted with addiction and the lives it destroys each day.

my heart is so saddened by this loss. and so frightened for the lives of his three sweet little children. Reagan, Taylor, & Kyle, may the Lord heal your wounds and hold you in His arms forever. may you find comfort in Him. i love you and i am here for you.

a dear dear dear friend of my family overdosed yesterday and this loss has taken a HUGE toll on our family. my step dad just explained the loss of his best friend as "an actual physical depression where i feel like i cannon move." they have been the closest of friends for 12 years, we have been there through the ups & downs of his life, the birth of his three children (reagan's middle name is Michelle after mine). my brother matty looked up to Ryan, as did his children. He was a giant teddy bear with the most amazing voice i have ever heard.

my heart is so scared for Marty as well. he has been seriously struggling with sobriety this past few months and this is sure to send him over the edge. i saw him cry for the first time in my life last night, seeing a grown man cry breaks my heart. at dinner we shared our favorite stories of ryan and switched between laughter and tears, until eventually we all went to bed. i fell asleep to the sound of my houehold crying.

please keep my family and the Richards family in your prayers. Ryan was a few weeks shy of his 40th birthday and he will be GREATLY missed by so many.